Thursday, April 12, 2007

Another Pleasant Valley Sunday

This weekend is the annual park clean-up day for the local baseball league. Afterwards there's a picnic in one of the pavilions, with hot dogs and hamburgers cooked by yours truly and some other poor saps whose wives wanted them out of the house. God knows how many kids will be there, whacked out on soda and candy, running around like short-circuited Disney animatrons, while the parents try to slink away and stick the coaches with the problem.

Oh yeah. I've been there in other years, refusing to make eye contact with one of my boys, pretending that I just happened to wander into this hellscape. Not this weekend. No, this time I'll be front and center, pretending that I'm not a misanthrope, pretending that I'm having fun, pretending that this isn't some horrible experiment gone wrong.

Christ, I need a drink already.

3 comments:

Jennifer said...

I'm not buying it, Snag. Although I can feel the pain of the situation, I sense you'll be forefront with bad jokes aplenty while your kids are attempting to not make eye contact. :)

Chuckles said...

If there are fenced areas, just dump the kids in there, toss in a few burgers and let the strong survive.

"Honey, where's Snaglet?"
"He didn't make it, he wasn't strong enough."
"Not again."
"We just have to keep trying."

Snag said...

Chuckles, you're brilliant. I'll try that out on my Lovely Bride!