Monday, May 31, 2010

Bird Is The Word

This was a long weekend, of course, which meant lots of good, healthy, Snag family fun.

"Jeez, dad, don't you find that even a little inappropriate?" asked my middle son. He was lying on the couch watching television.

"What's inappropriate?" I asked, plopping down on the other couch.

"Giving me the finger."

"Oh. That. Yeah, I suppose."

"In fact it borders on the morally reprehensible," he said.

"Big words for a little boy," I said.

"Thanks," he said. "But really, giving me the finger?"

"It's kind of funny, don't you think?"

"I guess. You're a horrible parent, though."

"That's my point," I said. "On a ten point scale, where would giving you the finger rate, compared to the other stuff I do?"

"About a three," he admitted.

"So there you are," I said.

"Mom still wouldn't approve," he said.

"I wouldn't approve of what?" asked the Lovely Bride, walking into the room.

"My outstanding parenting skills," I said.

"Yes," she said. "I lose a lot of sleep worrying that you're raising our children too well."

"Sleep well, my precious," I said, smooching her on the cheek.

The boy rolled his eyes and went back to his show.

"Can I punch you in the heart?" I asked him.

"Later, pops," he said.

"Right on," I said.

"Dear Lord," said the Lovely Bride.


ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Did you catch any walleye?

Snag said...

No, but I did eat a salmon.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

plopping down on the other couch.

I once lived in a flat with three roommates; in the living room we had four couches. On weekend "mornings" it would usually work out fine, unless a guest had passed out there the night before.

fish said...

Now I don't feel so bad teaching my kid how to throw a spitball.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

teach 'em to throw a beanball, fish. USEFUL knowledge.

Brando said...

No, but I did eat a salmon.

Cooked, or did you pull it out and gobble it down like a bear?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

how does one gobble down a bear?

Snag said...

A beanball? Hell, I've been teaching them to throw hand grenades.

Which is how I caught the salmon.

Substance McGravitas said...

I once lived in a flat with three roommates; in the living room we had four couches.

That's COOL. You could totally put sheets over them and make a fort.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

you presume we didn't, Subby.

Smut Clyde said...

My experience is that the flatmates keep moving under the sheets which ruins the effect.