Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Player

My friends and I were sitting on the retaining wall in center field of our local Little League ballpark when my youngest stomped to a halt in front of me. He'd gone straight from a game to a sleepover the previous night and was back at the park to watch his friends play. The circles under his eyes spoke to his exhaustion.

"Can I have some money?" he demanded.

"For what?" I asked.

"Mom's being a jerk."

"Are you going to use it to have her whacked?"

He rolled his eyes. "It's for concessions."

"No candy," I said.

"You're worse than mom," he snarled.

"Probably. No candy, though."

"How about a cheeseburger?"

"If you'll go away," I said, giving him a $10 bill. "Bring me some change."

"That's stupid," he said, stomping away. "I gave you change yesterday."

"You make me feel better about my own life," said one of my friends.

"We all have a role," I said.

7 comments:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

When are you going to make me feel better about my life, Snag?
~

Brando said...

"Are you going to use it to have her whacked?"

LOL.

No joke, word verification is "hosed."

Hamish Mack said...

I would not joke with the little kiwis about assassinations. That would be playing with fire.

Smut Clyde said...

We have taken care that Doktorling Sonja does not know the contents of the Frau Doktorin's will.

"That's stupid," he said, stomping away. "I gave you change yesterday."

Good point.

Substance McGravitas said...

No candy? How are you supposed to have a tantrum without a sugar rush?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

wait, I missed the most important part of this post.

Can I have some money, too?

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

Sure, ZRM.

But you will have to bring back change. (Said change will represent the original loan amount, plus the agreed upon interest. There will be certain collateral agreements, which you will sign now and understand later.)
~