Monday, August 10, 2009

Pipe Dreams

I wish I lived in a shire.

I would eat pudding and count lice.

I would use ripe tubers for currency, a bagel as my loincloth.

When I gargled, it would be as a free man.

All would hear my triumphant yowl as I cornered and established dominion over stoats and nails and other prey.

Filth would be my medium, the muses shrieking ideas as I wandered from yurt to yurt, begging here for a battery, there for a small pail of grout.

I would be happy, content to frolic and gibber the day away.

I wish I lived in a shire.


Mendacious D said...

Is this your way of saying you've sold out to the Right Wing?

Pinko Punko said...

I shall yabber with you, and together we shall fertilize the fields with organic materials.

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

This loincloth bagel concept has commercial potential.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Are you taking Lucy?

blue girl said...

I want to go to a yurt.

Substance McGravitas said...

Fuckin' bagels. Yessir.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Are there brains in a Shire?

Is there room for a Zombie in your yurt?

I hope that Muse keeps it down once in a while though. I need some sleep.

Capcha says sourboot. Is that currency in a shire, or would it be part of your media?

Kathleen said...

are your feet hairy enough?

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Also, I can't gibber.

fish said...

I don't understand. Where are the pipes?