Friday, May 1, 2009

Is It Just Me?

One of guys I work with and I like to host an annual picnic for the rest of the office. I ask B., one of the women who reports to me, to plan it, partly because she doesn't boss me around as much if she's busy and partly because she's got a knack for food shopping; last year she found the biggest chicken breasts I've ever seen. It took almost an hour to grill them.

Anyway, she and I had an extended email conversation while I was on my way back from Hell yesterday.

B.: Are you excited to come back :)

Snag: You can't imagine.

B.: Lots of changes have taken place while you have been away.

Snag: Oh Lord, what have you done?

B.: You will find out Monday.

Snag: If I'm still alive.

B.: I am sure you will be. You are going to live a long and painful life.

Snag: I think I have swine flu.

B.: You are such a freak!

Snag: I had a BLT for lunch yesterday.

B.: Yum, that sounds good. You can't catch the swine flu from food, you nut!

Snag: Then trichinosis.

B.: Oh fun, then you'll have a pet worm!

Snag: I hope it kills me.

B.: No, it won't. But you will be able to eat a lot of food now. It sounds like May 27th is going to be the date for the BBQ.

Snag: I'll be dead by then.

B.: Well make sure I get the money for the party first.

Snag: Sell my organs.

B.: No one will want them.

Snag: As medical curiosities.

B.: I will put them on EBay.

Snag: That should pay for some of that mutant chicken you like.

B.: LOL! Do you mean the ostrich meat?

Snag: Or emu.

B.: Like this?

Snag: Looks like me in the morning.

B.: See you Monday.

Snag: Have a good weekend


Jennifer said...

AHHHHHHHHHHH!!! And I thought Danny Gans dying was shock enough...

Righteous Bubba said...

I am scared.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

AG back briefly. Ready for Emus and Q!

Ready for Quaker Oil!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Only briefly. Then AG is gone for the entire month. Hooray.

Jennifer said...

AG- Snag has fired me. I'm so far behind... real life has been a tad needy so I haven't even finished P!!!!

Snag- you'll have it in your inbox tomorrow. No need to flash that emu grin at me.

Adorable Girlfriend said...

J-Lo, you are unfired. AG has the power. I, of all people know what beautiful veins and bloodshot eyes are these days. I posted Q over at EotS for everyone.

Take a view...

Have a fun month, kiddies! AG is hasta pasta!

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

That picture should make the red-tracksed one poop his pants.

Revenge of teh Zombie Emus!!

Anonymous said...

canine emus - gonna haunt my memories for a long time. well played, miss B. well played!

Jennifer said...

Hmmm, I think those teeth look like bad-ass primate teeth. I bet that emu has a bubble gum butt.

blue girl said...

I am so scared.