Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Mother Snag

While Kathleen's sending her significant other out for McMuffins I thought she'd enjoy boning up on some of the nursery rhymes she'll need to know.

Birds lay eggs and Snag eats eggs and that's why I have scurvy
I think I have rickets too, just like you.
Yes, birds lay eggs and Snag eats eggs and that's why I have scurvy
I think I have rickets too, just like you.

Hickory, trickery, tromp,
The moose ran through the swamp.
The clock struck six,
The moose shit a brick!
Hickory, trickery, tromp.

Jack is stupid,
Jack is dumb,
Jack's little brain
Is completely numb.

Humpty Dumpty lived on a farm.
Humpty Dumpty cut off his arm.
The ambulance came to take him away
But Humpty was already cold as the clay.

Ladybug! Ladybug!
Get out of town.
Your meth lab's on fire.
And your pit bull's been drowned.

Mary, Mary, fat and hairy,
How do you make soup?
With veal stock and pickled hocks,
And a dog that died of croup.

Old King Cole was a nasty old man,
And a nasty old man was he.
He called for his whip, and he called for his gun,
And he called for his prisoners three.
Every prisoner had a broken knee,
And a very sore back had he, had he.
AAAGH! AAAGH!, went the fiddlers three,
AAAGH, AAAGH! AIEE!
AAAGH! AAAGH!, went the fiddlers three,
AAAGH, AAAGH! AIEE!

6 comments:

Kathleen said...

LOL. I laughed til I cried.

"The clock struck six,
The moose shit a brick!"

Jennifer said...

Pregnancy has upped Kathleen's desire for teh curse words...

She's craving them AND strawberry shortcake.

Kathleen said...

oh great just add strawberry shortcake to the mix why don't you?@@##@!!

thanks A LOT

Jennifer said...

Oops. Sorry!! Maybe we'll all pitch in and order you cake of the month. :)

fish said...

Humpty Dumpty is brilliant.

I will help with cake of the month. But I am not sure how that is going to help you get a rootbeer float. Not that you like rootbeer floats.
With vanilla ice cream.

rotten mcdonald said...

And Jennifer though my zombie comment was tasteless...